Thursday, December 28, 2006

Who thinks up this shit?.....

The worst thing about a four day weekend is the catastrophic shock of returning to work.
You know, get all fat and happy sleeping in late,staying up WAY late,and congratulating yourself for being clever enough to have a job that will actually pay you to stay home....I was born for this!

But I'll be a son-of a- bitch if they don't turn around and expect you to earn the occasional luxury of all this by bustin' yer ass when it's over.

Who invented this whole work deal anyway?
There we were,in paradise,lounging around burping and farting at our leisure,not bothering anyone,when some wise ass anal retentive putz decided we'd all be better off wearing clothes,and punching time clocks.
What's worse,apparently everyone else standing around agreed,because the whole insane quest for productivity continues to this day.
I can't figure out if the guy was the first preacher,..or politician.
Hey!..Maybe it was a woman!..Nothing agitates 'em more than to see a guy content to be,..well,..content.They'll have no truck with such nonsense!..Speaking from my own experience,quite naturally..

I digress at my peril.

So,..anywhiz,..after 4 glorious days of sloth and debauchery,jumping back into the fray is only slightly more fun than a discount spinal tap.

At least it's only a three day work week,and tomorrow's Friday.
Hey!..We get a three day weekend on account of New Year's!..

I love this job..


At 8:58 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You change your mind quicker than a...well, if it weren't for that mustache I'd swear you were a woman. (beats self on head with rubber chicken for clear anti-feminist statement)

At 8:43 AM , Blogger Allan said...

I'm in the middle of an endless weekend with no sign of work a couch I can crash on till I'm 65?

At 12:22 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

They can make me wear pants, and they can make me show up every day, but they cannot make me be productive. It simply can't be done.

But don't tell them I told you that.

At 12:32 PM , Blogger Dan said...

Sling, I feel for you my friend. I've been trying to find someone to pay me for sitting home on my ass reading books, surfing the web, and snoozing. Still no luck.

If I ever find such a person I'll see if they can use you as well.

At 4:53 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

Hey, don't lay that whole work week charge at my door, mister. Who do you think invented Cat Weekend?

At 11:43 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Work? Wozzaaaaaaat????

At 5:31 AM , Blogger Grish said...

I'm with ya. I hate returning to the grind..

At 6:21 AM , Blogger Legal Alien said...

Here's Legal Alien's anti-work regimen:

(1) Marry well-to-do professional chick.

(2) Knock her up.

(3) Convince her how great an idea it would be for you to take a two-year sabbatical to raise the baby (or babies).

(4) Spend two years raising the baby (or babies).

(5) Long for adult company, intellectual stimulation, the catharsis of pressure of deadlines, etc.

(6) Sing the Stones' "You Can't Always Get What You Want" to self constantly.

At 9:18 AM , Blogger Sling said...

evangeline-Women change their minds,in my case it's more a matter of having a short attention span.

allan-Been there my friend.wierd how all a guy wants is time off,till you get buttloads of it.

JP-Yer a rebel dude...Up the establishment!

dan-The closest I've found is an ad for adult movie "Stuntmen".
Sadly,they said my "resume" wasn't adequate.

lorraine-First I wrote it,then I read your "cat weekend" post,then I was sorry..You know,...for a minute..

..and once again,Charlie didn't get the memo..;)

grish-We're worker bees buddy..It's what we do. :)

Legal A.-I actually did that during my second marriage.Only,while I was at home raising my youngest,Mommy was out looking for a "New Daddy"..

At 10:41 AM , Blogger ruby rocks said...

work your fingers to the bone and what do ya get?

boney fingers!

At 10:46 AM , Blogger Sling said...

ruby rocks- I love that song!! :)

At 2:48 PM , Blogger HORIZON said...

Ouch, and those spinal taps are sore- you must be miffed Sling.
l feel your pain but being a woman am not too sure now, if l should be so empathetic. ;) Trust a man to blame a woman!
Enjoy the New Year celebrations!

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