Wednesday, May 28, 2008 the vernacular.

I had a terrific 3 day weekend,but now it's time to get back to work.
We're smack in the middle of the biggest job we've ever done!

Who in god's green earth needs over 60 drawers in their kitchen?..I kid you not.
These aren't just your standard flatware,and dish towel sized drawers either.
Many of them are nearly 2 feet wide,and 6 inches deep.

Oh,let's not forget the bathrooms,and laundry room...another 20 drawers.
How many friggin' Q-tips and corn pads can you stuff in 20 freakin' drawers?
These people have entirely too much stuff!
..and that's just the base cabs,which by the by,are nearly all over 8 feet long.

Massive overheads,two linen closets that are over 110 inches high,thirty inches wide,and two feet deep.Each one three-tiered,with nine adjustable shelves.

It's like a Martha Stewart showroom fer crissake!
And don't ya know,all this has to be installed come this Friday...

I've already been informed that I'm going on this install.
The home is located three hours from O-Town,in a charmingly named little burg called 'Shingletown' can't make this stuff up.

Let's do the math,shall we?
Six hours drive time,one hour to unload two trailers full of heavy ass Oak cabinetry,and at least 5 hours of actual installation!
..I'm having a retroactive hernia.

Remember a few months ago when I was bitching about not having enough work,and offering nightly prayers for business to pick up??
..god is laughin' his ass off.

Assuming that all this goes as planned,I'll be posting pix of the final results.
It's gonna be beautiful!

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At 6:27 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have a useless back brace if'n ya want it. And by 'useless' I am actually refering to the brace itself ($10.00 later!) and not your back.

At 6:32 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

Well, git 'er done, chum! The women folks is comin'.

Or maybe we could help. I know how to install drawer pulls. If they are easy. And the placement is already measured. And the holes are pre-drilled. No, wait. I can use a drill. See? Useful.

At 7:03 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Hat-tasia- Thanks doll!..but I already have a useless back brace.
'Useless',in that I don't use it because it feels like I'm wearing a straight jacket.
Not that I know what wearing a straight jacket feels like,what with my being heavily sedated at the time.

Rainey- YIPPEE!..Womenfolks with drills and backbraces!
There really is a God! ;)

At 7:29 PM , Blogger cs said...

Feast or famine--we have the same curiosities up here. One month, OMG, can we eat? Next month, when will I see you honey. What county are you in? You're breaking up....Never heard of it.
Yup, and never ever tell a woman she has too much drawer space. You could end up in some serious trouble bubba.

Have fun, get some Ben Gay....

At 7:40 PM , Blogger Sling said...

CS- I know women love their drawer space,and lord knows,they're entitled to it.
But the Library of Congress has less drawers to accomodate the entire Dewey decimal system fer crissake!..just sayin'.

At 8:27 PM , Blogger Citymouse said...

gee, what kind of work do these people do? I mean with the state of the world? I want their job!

At 8:31 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Mouse- I think they are serial killers,with a dire need of extra storage space.
..or they just have buttloads of kitchen utensils.

At 8:32 PM , Blogger yellowdog granny said...

i can't wait to see the pictures...i bet it's beautiful...need any help.?...I'll give you a hand....(sound of jackiesue clapping)

At 8:38 PM , Blogger rosemary said...

I want those drawers....I could fill em up in a day and be bitchin about not having enough space when I was done.

At 9:05 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Yellerdawg- It's gonna be gorgeous!
Tons of roll out drawers behind cabinet doors,slide out recycle bins,and a trick 'Bar' set up with two open cabs framing a nice wine rack.
All clear laquered red oak.
No staining!..Woo hoo! :)

Rosie- I'm guessin' you have buttloads of kitchen utensils,right? ;)

At 5:36 AM , Blogger Doralong said...

There is no such thing as too many drawers my friend. Ask any cook ;)

At 10:22 AM , Blogger sageweb said...

Oh I want to see the finished pics...I would love all that storage for each Qtip.

At 2:09 PM , Blogger Kimberly Ann said...

As with good pie, good love or good shoes, you can never have enough good cabinets.

At 3:06 PM , Blogger billy pilgrim said...

wow, i'll bet that's gonna cost more than 200 bucks.

probably cost a lot to buy all the stuff to put in them too.

At 5:19 PM , Blogger booda baby said...

And some lemony slush for you, too, I see.

At 6:41 PM , Blogger Sling said...

doralong- My dad always said,'The way to a woman's heart is through her drawers'..Apparently I misinterpereted that.

Sage- I'd have to fill 'em up with dirty laundry,and back issues of National Geographic.

kimberly ann- That's the philosophy that keeps me in business right there!

billy P.- Materials and labor come to about $83.12..Travel time,and the cost of gasoline rounds that out to an even $15,000 bucks.

booda babe- When life hands you lemons,get hammered!

At 6:49 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You see, this is what is wrong with our culture. Or, rater, one of the things that is wrong. NO ONE needs that many drawers and cabinets. It's greed. That said, I am sure you will do a beautiful job with it and I look forward to the pictures.

At 7:40 PM , Blogger Sling said...

citizen- There's a metaphor here that I can't really think of right now,but it seems to me that all those drawers are just begging to be filled.
I got the word this afternoon that I'm definitely going on the install,so pix will sure be forthcoming!

At 9:44 PM , Blogger Mom said...

I have exactly five drawers in my kitchen. They hold everything I need, but I don't cook anything too fancy.
We have two bathrooms. One has three drawers, the other has two. They seem to hold all we need.We just don't need very much.

At 10:04 PM , Blogger Sling said...

mom- You have two bathrooms??

At 12:33 PM , Blogger Middle Child said...

Call me ol cynical but I just bet they are doctors or dentists - retired politicians or senior bureaucrats - an I'll just bet when all that stuff is installed and all the new saucpans etc are inside -

At 2:27 PM , Blogger Kari (GrannySkywalker) said...

Damn. I'd like to see the house that HOLDS all that cabinetry. Yow-za!
Hope the job went well and can't wait to see the pics.


At 7:07 PM , Blogger Serena Joy said...

Dang! All my drawers eventually turn into junk drawers, so I sure wouldn't want that many in my house. It's kind of fun to ponder on what nefarious things they're going to do with them, though.:)

At 8:17 PM , Blogger Sling said...

middle child- fergot AmWay salesman.
..And the drawers will likely be filled with Mary Kay products.

kari- The job is done!
I can't give you the full picture of just how big this house is,(they expect me to occupy myself with actual work,and not so much photo-journalism),but I did get some nice interior shots. :)

serena joy- They seem like nice folks.
Quiet,and keeping to themselves on a very secluded 5 acres...Oh. :O


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