Monday, February 16, 2009

So..What's in it for me?

President Obama is scheduled to sign the Economic Stimulus Package,recently passed by Congress,tomorrow in Denver.
Why in Denver,by the way?..I mean,it seems like the kind of landmark deal he'd want to enact for posterity,sitting large-and-in-charge behind the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office.
Maybe I like that image too much in my own head?
I just don't know..

In any case,..I'm proud of him for jumping in there with both feet,and bulldogging this legislation through Congress short of his first thirty days in office,just like he promised he would do during the campaign.
I'd like to note that the Republicans also did their part in living up to my expectations,..thumping the podium,rending their garments,and generally raising the hue and cry over how disastrous this partisan Democratic boondoggle would surely prove to be.
I'm not exactly sure who it is they're trying to convince that anything they have to say about anything holds merit at this point,but if it helps them snuggle up to the thirty-seven morons still left in this country that buy into their philosophies,I say let 'em go ahead and enjoy the delusion.
Just please,..don't speak out,or rustle papers while the grown-ups are having a discussion.

If I've left you with the impression that I'm confident the stimulus deal is gonna be the miracle salve that soothes the economic rug burns on our knees we've suffered over the last eight years,allow me to clarify.
I haven't got a clue..

But I do know this!
Part of the package includes an extra $100.00 a month in unemployment benefits.
After I've budgeted out my rent,utilities,and food,..I'm left with exactly $19.00,every two weeks,to use as I might for such habitual luxuries as tobacco,brown liquor,and personal hygiene products.
..In that order.

I'm really not complaining...I know for an actual fact that many of my worker-bee brethren would gladly trade places with me,..but I gotta tell ya,I'm fit to hoot and holler,and throw babies all up in the air over the prospect of having an additional $25 smacks a week!!

Is that selfish?..Yes..It is.

Perhaps I'll repent of my greed while I'm standing in line at Wal-Mart to purchase that 6-pack of Hane's no-droop crew socks I've had my eye on,'lo these past several months.




At 1:15 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, that is a nice little bonus. I don't know how it will all go either, but somehitng has to happen, so I'm hopeful.

At 1:27 PM , Blogger sageweb said...

Wow good news for you on the raise. I would prefer brown liquor over socks anyday.

At 3:30 PM , Blogger billy pilgrim said...

are those socks made in china????

At 4:22 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Citizen- I was impressed when Obama said,more or less,that if this plan fails,he'll accept the blame.

Sage- Fortunately,now I can have both!

Billy P.- I kid you not,I knew you were gonna ask me that!!

I did the research ahead of time..
Hanes is based in Winston-Salem,North Carolina,and has manufacturing companies in various parts of Europe and Eastern Europe, including the United Kingdom, Italy, Germany, France and Spain.
None in China..

At 4:27 PM , Blogger austexgrl said... friend...Down at the hospital we have a saying....." some day it's not worth it to even gnaw through the restraints!"

At 6:01 AM , Blogger cs said...

Yes, I heard of the extra $$ too. Don't forget to that we have to pay taxes on that down the road. So, try to put aside 10% a week to cover it--we just saw the tax person this weekend and she is reminding us folks to tuck away some --so tuck some in your new socks each week. Or you'll get caught with saggy socks!

At 9:01 AM , Blogger Sling said...

austexgrl- I love it!..I'm stealing that line,and making it my own. ;)

CS- I read in a synopsis online that the first $2,400 in benefits received in 2009 will not be taxed.
We do have the option on our weekly forms to have them withhold taxes from each check.
Still,putting aside a little something every week is something I intend to do..

At 10:00 AM , Blogger Random Thinker said...

The package also will require 50% of laid off workers' COBRA costs to be paid by their former employer and then taken as a credit against regular payroll taxes. This should help alot since loss of benefits hits families hard. But I think this whole mess will just take time to work itself out. Though I suppose it makes us feel better to be doing something than nothing.

At 10:57 AM , Blogger yellowdog granny said...

good news for you..nice to know that someone will benefit from the package...them republicans are just digging their own graves...did you watch the beginning of sat. night live this past sat? if not you need to find it and watch's hysterical.about the repbulicans so sure obama is bad and they are talking about impeaching him, after all it's been 3 weeks..and doing an expose on the daughters..pretty funny ...

At 11:46 AM , Blogger rosemary said...

Yup, I got a 5.8% SS raise and I hear I will get a $250 check because I am old. I'll take it. sling, did the cabinet company you worked for fold?

At 4:51 PM , Blogger booda baby said...

I'm not kidding. If you run out of money for brown liquor, I think it's time to put up a Paypal button on your blog and let your pals pay you a little help in the entertainment section.

I'm not kidding. What the hell do I work for if not to spend money on stuff I care about? You, of course, but I care about brown liquor like nobody's bizness. Okay, mine's a slightly rubier shade, but ... hell no. I will not go on without at least ONE glass o' wine.

At 8:02 PM , Blogger Middle Child said...

Our PM here did a big cash distribution just before Christmas It was about$1400 for the unemployed, the pensioners and the disabled...and all the wealthy were throwing up their hands in horrow because the plebs and poverty stricken might spend it all on something frivilous...I mean to say...they might get a TV set or a car registered...when I consider what some of the fat cats spend on ome dinner out "How dare they presume to preach"

At 9:43 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Thinker- There's a lot about this bill that I like,and that gives me some hope for things to get better.
I'm a big fan of modernizing our infrastructure,and focusing some attention on know,..actual science,and not 'Intelligent Design'.
Plus!..Alternative energy!..Whenever I heard 'Drill,baby,drill' I'd think,'Yeah,..while we're at it we can invest in that newfangled carrier pidgeon technology too'..

Yellerdawg- I just caught some of the excerpts of SNL on the news shows.
Gotta love Dan Aykroyd!

Rosie- The cab shop is still open doll,but only the family is keeping it runnin'.
They're having a hard time collecting the money that people owe them.

Booda Babe- Aren't you a livin' doll!..
Of course,this is what I do for fun..I'm guessin' my new windfall will take care of my brown liquor needs just fine.

Middle Child- Oh,..we're ready to bring back the Guillotine 'round these parts.
The Right-Wingers and their 'Let them eat cake' mentality are this close to some serious class warfare.

At 6:02 AM , Blogger Doralong said...

I am more firmly convinced with every passing day that it's going to end up in a full scale class war and riots in the streets at the rate the situation continues to disintegrate.

And I like Booda's idea, get on that, will you?

At 10:14 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Doralong- Oh,I predict that some belligerent malcontent of say,German/Scotch/Irish descent,is gonna get all liquored up one day and decide to storm the castle!
..or invade Poland..One or the other.

At 6:22 PM , Blogger Miss Healthypants said...

Love the socks ending! *hee hee*


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