Thursday, April 15, 2010

C'mon!..Put some effort into it!

I was spending my evening as usual,stalking my Facebook buddies,and eating Sardines on Chicken-in-a-biskits,when I came across the lovely Christine's status update wherein she laments over the deluge of anti-Obama e-mails she receives from one of her relatives.
She didn't get into the specifics of type,but my thoughts went directly to the abundance of Obama jokes that have permeated the interweaves since his inauguration.

We've all seen them a hundred times..
Watermelons growing on the White House lawn.
Obama shining Sarah Palin's shoes..
Obama riding a camel,and wearing a Turban..
You get the idea.

Obviously,and immediately,they tend to repulse folks of good conscience by virtue of,..well,..their complete lack of virtue.
Still,and right up there in my top two criticisms,is the disappointing fact that they simply are not funny!

I've come to the conclusion that Conservatives,by and large,absolutely do not have a clue as to how to put the 'fun' in funny.
Let's face it..It doesn't take a 'Dr. House' to take one look at John Boehner's strained countenance,and attribute his malevolent behavior to the fact that this is a man that hasn't had a decent bowel movement in decades.

I mean,..damn..Lighten up homie.

I truly enjoy a good joke but,where's the flavor?..where's the nuance?..where's the craftsmanship that goes into constructing a genuinely humorous scenario??

And so,..in a bi-partisan attempt to take up the half-assed slackedness of my Right Wing contemporaries,I offer up the following on their behalf.
You don't have to agree with the premise,to get a grin out of some o' these...

********Obama Jokes********


  • Based on his performance in office so far, President Obama should do just fine on his future tax returns.. After all, he will be able to write off his second term.

  • The Obama economy is so bad,..that the CEO of Wal-Mart was seen shopping at Wal-Mart.

  • Under Obama,everyone in America will be working for the government.. Democrats will be on the payrolls and Republicans will be on the tax rolls.

  • Due to Obama's lending agreement with our creditors,.'Made In America' stickers will now be manufactured in China. (Now that's funny right there!..I don't care who ya are).

  • "I thought it was one of those heartwarming infomercials.. It had a wonderful ending. In the final scene,Barack Obama is adopted by Angelina Jolie." ~Dave Letterman.

  • John McCain, Hillary Clinton, and Barack Obama all die and go to heaven. God looks down from his throne and asks McCain, "Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?"
    McCain takes a breath and then replies, "Well, I think so because I was a great leader and tried to follow the words in your great book." God looks down and then says, "You can sit to my left side."
    So, McCain takes his seat and then God asks the same question to Hillary, "Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?" Hillary thinks for a second and then replies, "I think so because I have been fighting for the rights of so many people for so long." God again looks down and this time says, "You can sit to my right side."
    Finally God turns to Barack Obama and asks, "Do you think you deserve to be in heaven?"
    Obama smiled and replied, "I think you're in my seat."
Just sayin',..you might want to copy these down,to interject the next time you find yourselves surrounded by the juvenile offerings that seem to pass for humor amongst the staid Republican'ts.
...You'll be the hit of the Tea Party.

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21 Comments:

At 2:25 PM , Blogger YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

you are so correct..the emails aren't funny..mainly they just recycled the ones with bush and added obama..now when they were about bush they were funny..snort*
i do like your jokes though..especially the last one..

 
At 3:22 PM , Blogger Miss Healthypants said...

Bwahaha! :) Now those are some honest-to-goodness FUNNY jokes--not to mention that they're not blatantly racist.

I gotta say, that last one made me laugh the most--too funny! :)

 
At 3:44 PM , Blogger Sling said...

I just want the loyal opposition to give me something decent to work with.
Oh,..I'm gonna vote for Obama to serve his second term,but I'm not married to the guy.
..Speaking of marriage,..Some right wingers need to lay off Michelle and the kids! (There are some really tasteless remarks out there).
I wouldn't tolerate any slights of the charming and gracious Laura Bush,and I won't stand for attacks on our current First Lady!..end of rant. ;)

 
At 4:27 PM , Blogger Random Thinker said...

The crap I get sent is alarmist type stuff. Trying to prove to me that he's not American or that he's a Muslim. I never sent them emails trying to prove Bush was an idiot. But then again, I guess I didn't have to.

 
At 5:00 PM , Blogger billy pilgrim said...

i think tea is a sacred drink and these arseholes should come up with another name for their clique.

 
At 5:46 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Thinker- Yep..I've seen the desperate arguments over Obama's citizenship,and I have to ask,'So..You're saying that every single person that Obama came into contact with the first 30 years of his life is in on the conspiracy?'..How many times has he needed to produce a birth certificate?..Enrolling in grade school,..getting a driver's licence,..traveling abroad,..and not a single person has come forward to dispute his citizenship?..Gimme a break.
..And as far as Bush being an idiot,..Well..The sky is blue,after all.

Billy P.- I just can't see their right to claim membership in the Tea Party..The original tea party was an act of defiance against taxation without representation!..I think Obama's Constitutional election by an overwhelming majority pretty much negates any claim to the title.

 
At 6:28 PM , Blogger Mom said...

I laughed most at Letterman's comment.
I guess the jokes, both the funny and the stupid, are part of the job.
I just don't get the hatred and anger. It is scary.

 
At 6:29 PM , Blogger booda baby said...

This made me wonder how I could have heard none of this. Nothing at all. And then I remembered. I just don't know people who'd send shit like that because I draw a pretty thick line at stupid. You can be a lot of things, but that's not one of them.

What a sexy picture.

 
At 7:42 PM , Blogger Charlene said...

Every one of these bigoted jokes can be rewritten to change the POV to mine. I got sick of that game back in the 1990s.

My sister is the stupid one in the family. She's on Facebook and posted stuff on my wall until I blocked her.

The other day I joined a "Glenn Beck is an idiot" and she sent me a comment on the notification: Have you ever listened to him even once?

I ignored it.

She wants me to argue with her in Facebook public. I won't do it. It is so easy to drive her nuts that way.

When we were kids she was standing behind the door when god hollered: brains get our brains here. She though he said trains and she was scared of trains.

 
At 9:02 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Mom- The jokes are part of the job!..As Americans,it's our civic duty to hammer our leaders incessantly.
..As adults,we are obliged to do it with some measure of class.

Booda Babe- Count your blessings at being spared the stupidity of so many e-mailers.
Sometimes,I wanna jab pencils in my eyes!

Charlene- Glenn,'I promised myself I would cry',Beck makes me embarrassed to be a white man.

 
At 5:47 AM , Blogger sageweb said...

wow anonymous is full of such wisdom. hahahah on the Obama jokes..did you eat all the chicken bisquits?

 
At 7:40 AM , Blogger laurent said...

Whoever anonymous is, he or she is not very literate in Asian languages, repeating the same character over and over again does not make a sentence. A prankster I bet.

 
At 7:46 AM , Blogger laurent said...

BTW if you were wondering this is Japanese Kanji.

 
At 10:49 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Sage- I deleted all of Anonyputz' comments before I knew it was wisdom..Story of my life.
I love me some chicken-in-a-biskits!..I'll pound down a whole box in one sitting. :)

Laurent- Japanese Kanji?..There goes my theory about space aliens trying to contact me.

 
At 11:41 AM , Blogger secret agent woman said...

That's a big assumption you're making that the Tea Partyists would even get your jokes!

 
At 2:38 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Secret Agent Woman- It really does seem like an uphill battle.
Folks that can't even appreciate the outrageous comedy in shelling out $500.00 to hear Sarah Palin speak,are probably beyond help.

 
At 3:16 AM , Blogger Shrinky said...

Oh, that last one is priceless - still smiling! I am sick to the back teeth of receiving junk, offensive, racist so called "Jokes" against Obama from one alleged "friend" (a completely one-sided delussion on his part). The kicker is, I'm not even American, so WTF is he hoping to gain, like I'm gonna' change my vote, or something?? Sheesh..

 
At 11:58 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Shrinky- HA!..Now I have to tell you a story.
During the campaign,a co-worker came back into my area,all in a dither because he just heard from Rush Limbaugh that Obama had his aides plaster campaign posters on the Western Wall in Jerusalem!
..I kid you not,he believed this.
I just shook my head,'Yeah..Lord knows he's after that coveted Israeli vote'..

 
At 10:03 PM , Blogger mi said...

wow, i must travel in benign circles because i haven't seen any anti-obama emails like the ones you described.

your last joke, however, made me laugh out loud.

(btw, sling - i am barista brat unmasked)

 
At 10:51 PM , Blogger Sling said...

mi- Hiya B.Brat!!.Nice to see you out and about. :)
Actually,I don't receive those kind of emails myself,but I live in a largely Republican area,and people I run into feel obligated to share that crap with me,or have it printed out to post in their workspaces.
..I'll stop by your place and say hi!

 
At 7:48 PM , Blogger Middle Child said...

"where's the flavor?..where's the nuance?..where's the craftsmanship that goes into constructing a genuinely humorous scenario?"

Exactly -

I liked the last one best -

Will have to blog about our woeful PM Mr Elmer Fudd the grub...and he really is a grub

 

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