Friday, December 04, 2009

Unfinished Draft..

Like most bloggers,I write a lot of things under the influence of cheap brown liquor,..and then save them as a 'Draft'.
Viewed in the harsh light of day,and after a hearty breakfast of scrambled eggs,sausage,hash browns,wheat toast,..and coffee,....we recognize a certain nebulous quality of intent that just doesn't quite make the cut.

Do you do like I do,and spend five minutes writing a post,and two days editing it?
..Fuck that shit.
Follows,a recently unearthed draft,in unedited form..

There's been a fable going around among generations of mindless believers,that I think needs to be put to rest once and for all.
The delusion that there is some kind of unseen force prevalent in the universe,that holds sway over our daily lives.

Whole cultures wake to it's supposed power,revolve their livelihoods around it's purpose,and worship at it's altar with unwavering determination.
Still and all,this omnipotent entity remains invisible,as if the fabric of it's being relies entirely on the acceptance of it's existence,as a matter of faith.

Well,I think it's high time we,as sapiens,discarded these mystic notions of an invisible and ever present spectre.
Let us all,in unison,stick our car keys in the light socket,and prove once and for all that ELECTRICITY does not exist!
..Can I get an 'Amen'!

(Kool-Aid will be available in the lobby)..



At 5:40 PM , Blogger booda baby said...

Oh. That's a novel idea - SAVE the wine-soaked bit. I kind of like the gusto that I get to press the 'publish this tripe' with (and I don't care ONE BIT that I'm ending sentences with prepositions).

How many of these do you have? Think you could stitch them together into a novella? That many?

At 5:58 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Booooda Babe- HA!..I gotta admit,hitting the 'Publish this tripe' button was most cathartic.
I'm still trying to decipher exactly what my point was supposed to be.
..How many buttloads are in a shit-ton?..That's how many of these I have waiting in the wings.
Mostly,they are just titles that I assume I was going to revolve a post around.

At 6:26 PM , Blogger Mom said...

I am a devout believer in electricity and it's great and awesome power.

At 7:17 PM , Blogger Random Thinker said...

You make laugh!

At 7:26 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Mom- Me too doll..Where else could the light come from?

Thinker- ..Then my work here is done. :)

At 8:57 PM , Blogger YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

I love it when you go off the grid..

At 9:17 PM , Blogger jan said...

If I send you some of the brown liquid, would you go ahead and publish them?

At 12:29 AM , Blogger Willym said...

Okay where we at the same brown bag - I was just looking and I got 998 published items and 28 drafts... some were very relevant... at the time, a few were mindless ramblings and others so damned profound they scare me but nothing to match this piece of theological rambling. And I can only assume there will be more... pass the bag with the brown stuff in it will you?

At 6:37 AM , Blogger sageweb said...

Hahahaha you are very talented sober but the drunk post is very good. I am off to the light socket now.

At 7:48 AM , Blogger billy pilgrim said...

yup, most of my brilliant ideas turn out to be pretty stupid when looking at them the next day.


At 10:38 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want to know what the cheap brown stuff is.
Random Thinkers cousin Bonnie

At 10:56 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Yellerdawg- It's one of my favorite things about blogging.
All that yelling and cursing and pounding of fists,without the cops showing up!

Jan- Send all your brown liquor to:
c/o O-Town,
and I'll respond in some manner eventually,..sooner or later.

Willym- I'd be happy to share a bottle,as well as the resulting incoherent ramblings with you anytime buddy!

Sage- Just don't drink the Kool-Aid!

Billy P.- I learned early on that it's sometimes best to take a second look at things before hitting 'Publish'..

AnonyBonnie- Hi kid!.. I can get a whole gallon of 'Ancient Age' whiskey for 12 bucks at Food-Maxx.

At 3:15 PM , Blogger secret agent woman said...

Reminds me of the George Carlin bit about worshipping the sun because he has actually seen it. Elctricity would work, too, in the form of static sparks and lightning.

At 3:28 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Secret Agent Woman- Boy,..there's just no shaking you Electramentalists from your faith.

At 7:20 AM , Blogger Bad Alice said...

That's funny! What kind of Kool-Aid?

At 10:53 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Bad Alice-'s a secret Jones family recipe. :O

At 8:38 AM , Blogger apositivepessimist said...

Oh fuck no I would never take two days editing I‘d take two days writing the bugger…although I admit to a must-edit addiction…moreso for the “flow” than punctuation, writing rules etc etc

I’ve “tested” it BEFORE at 240 volts. When I was a kid of about six I did that…why is my bloody toast not popping up, oh there it is stuck to the inside, I’ll just stick this knife in to release it before it burns...I passed. Obviously.

At 3:18 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Apos- Oh,I'm hooked on editing!..I sweat over a post for hours,and still end up making changes after it's published.
I tend to do electrical repairs without turning off the circuit breakers..too lazy..consequently,I've been bitten many times.
Of course,it's only 110 v. over here,so you get used to it.

At 7:09 PM , Blogger Miss Healthypants said...

You are a funny drunkard! *hee hee*

(No offense meant; I call my hubby a drunkard all the time--and I mean that in the nicest way, of course. :) )

At 8:29 PM , Blogger Middle Child said... is too short not to have a wee dram or three...and also Sling the sky is not falling, like all the Prime Ministers and presidents try to make us believe. They could cut pollution etc by massive amounts if they stayed in Canberra, London Washington or wherever and used the internet and faxes to keep in touch...imagine how much hot air and whatsit comes out the back of the thousands of jets they all used to go to Wonder wonderful Copenhagen...Grrr but we have to cut down. And no drinkie on board...not yet

At 12:14 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice post & nice blog. I love both.


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