Tuesday, September 11, 2007

On this date...


I was pretty sure that there would be a number of well written posts among the residents of Bloggertown, paying homage to the tragic circumstances that occurred six years past.
People like Lorraine,and pretty much everyone on my blogroll,whose character and spirit are frequent inspiration to someone like myself,who hasn't always taken the high road...I'll happily defer to them to express the sentiments I know we all feel about that dismal day.

Live long enough,and you can randomly pick any day on the calendar,and attach some personal significance to it.
I met my first wife,Phyllis,when I was 15 years old,and fell instantly in love.
Even now,I see her in my mind's eye as she was then.
Sleek brown hair,cute little butt,and huge green eyes!...I saw my children in those eyes.(oh shut up...I know that's corny,but this is my reminiscence dammit!).

In any case,..one raging hormonal year after we began "going steady",we lost our virginity to each other.
One year later,I joined the Army,..you know,to become a man,..and within 6 months we were married.
She wasn't pregnant or anything,and we had to get dispensation from a judge to get married because she was only 16.
I made the greatest pitch of my life to convince him of the soundness of our sincerity,and he relented.
We stayed married for 13 years.

In that time,Phyllis gave me 2 children,who have since given me 3 grandchildren...Soon a fourth.
We divorced,not because of any heinous and irretrievable acts on either of our parts.I think it was simply that we married too young,...and grew up.
Grew up to be more different from each other than could be reconciled.
Still,she was my first true love.

Today is Phyllis' 53rd birthday...I just wanted to remember that.










15 Comments:

At 2:10 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

Happy birthday, Phyllis! That's a really nice post, Sling. My first husband, to whom I gave no children, is in love with me to this day. He tells me I am, and will always be, his one true love. That used to make me feel guilty. Now, it's just really bittersweet. Like you and Phyllis, we divorced only because we married way too young (19 and 18). Silly kids.

 
At 2:18 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

A much happier way to remember this day, my friend. I wonder what the calendar holds for me all of the time. I think, "Hmm. I wonder if today will mean something someday?" Because I'm a bit of a loon.

 
At 2:31 PM , Blogger Serena said...

What a sweet story. Happy Birthday to Phyllis.

 
At 2:46 PM , Blogger rosemary said...

Love your story, Sling. Wish I could have good memories of my first love, but sadly he was an asshole and I was the best thing that ever happened to him....however I doubt he will ever realize that because his lips are stuck in a beer can. We married at 16 and 19.....silly kid playing at love and marriage was me!

 
At 2:53 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

Happy birthday, Phyllis. And Harry Connick, Jr. And all the people who were born on this day.

 
At 6:15 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You mean that 9/11 has other meanings, and some of them quite good?

The terrorists have SO not won.

 
At 6:38 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's a great story. I'm on good terms with my ex-husband. The strange thing is how surprised so many people are when we tell them that.

 
At 6:53 PM , Blogger Mom said...

Sling, you really are just an ol' softy.

 
At 7:54 PM , Blogger Citymouse said...

what jp said.
and thank you.

 
At 6:40 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice post, Sling. I tire of the memorials because it makes me relive the sadness of that day, and it has been so politicized of late, that I just want to turn it down a bit. I enjoyed your bittersweet memories today, and am happy you received so much from that union, even though you ended up growing apart.

 
At 7:28 AM , Blogger the rube said...

now i know why all these broads love you, you're just a sensitive guy.

 
At 9:25 AM , Blogger CS said...

That is really beautiful. So many people cannot hold on to the good they saw in their ex, and it's lovely to hear someone say just that.

 
At 9:37 AM , Blogger more cowbell said...

Sling, thanks for a great post. Relating, here. The Ex and I got married at 18. We made it 10 years and 3 kids. Way too young to commit a lifetime. Of course, mine did involve the requisite heinous acts on his part, but I think the acts are usually symptoms, not the real problems. Anyway, what I miss most is the 10yrs after the Big D. I was better off as a person out of that marriage, but we remained friends, supporters, partners in parenting. It was the best of both worlds -- I kept my friend and coparent, cut out the negative shit. I thought we would always be that way, and that's what makes me most sad; not the loss of the marriage, but the loss of what he had after, those good feelings, that different love of 2 people who basically did grow up together and made it through all kinds of bullshit.

Anyway, it was so very nice to read about your relationship with and thoughts about Phyllis. Happy Birthday to her.

 
At 11:15 PM , Blogger Middle Child said...

Thanks Sling...what lovely memories. Glad you two had kids because each other will always be alive in those kids and grandkids.

As explained to Gna...fro us 9/11 is 11/9 ad in the US you have a different dating system... it can be confusing. Our eldest daughter was also bonr on 11/9 - long before it happened...many happy things happened on that day.

 
At 9:19 AM , Blogger yellowdoggranny said...

ahhh, how sweet is that...happy birthday phylis

 

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