Wednesday, November 28, 2007

What do you wanna do?..

..I dunno...What do you wanna do?...

Well it hasn't really been all glamour and excitement here at Sling's Domain.
Once the Thanksgiving lethargy settled in,I was having too much fun exploring the innumerable ways(43)there are to lounge on my couch in a vegetative state,to accomplish anything blogworthy.
I did finally get my new hard drive installed!

"What??..Weren't you s'posed to do that like,..weeks ago?"..

Yes I was...But,(you can start a sentence with "But"),..When my new hard drive arrived,it looked like the pins wouldn't match my laptop,so I was gonna send it back.

(Insert procrastination here)..
Turns out,..I'm an idiot...

(Insert incredulous gasps of disbelief here!).

..(here??)...

Fine then!..See if I act surprised next time you decide it would be a good idea to make toast while taking a bubble bath,or don't have the uncommon good sense to realize that the little plastic adapter on yer ailing hard drive fits quite nicely on the one that's been sitting on your desk for days!..

"..ummm..Is there a particularly salient point to this story Sling?"..

No.

Yesterday,The Lizzard King did some work for a local flooring business!
This is the current state of our miserable foyer,(pardon my French)..While it may not look too bad in the photo,It is thoroughly uninviting...Even the dog will only come in the back door.
..Thanks to some shrewd bargaining on LK's part,we will be installing this brand new,genuine artificial,Oak flooring!..Sometime...Sooner or later.

...and there you have it.

**Important Tourist Advisory!**

When traveling in Northern California,be sure to pronounce "Almond"" the same way you pronounce "Salmon"...They get really pissed if you say "All-mond"..

Labels:

24 Comments:

At 6:39 PM , Blogger Nunnie's Attic said...

Well it's about freaking time! I thought you had decided your best days of blogging were behind you and why bother. Enter sloth!

You know you can be a sloth, my friend. You just have to tell us about it.

Love,
Julie

 
At 6:48 PM , Blogger Mom said...

Missed you while you were busy being a sloth.
I love genuine artificial anything!

 
At 6:51 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Julie- 3 parts sloth,..1 part infernal newfangled gadget!!
Stir,and serve with mass quantities of leftover Turkey and stuffing...

I've been drinking a little.

 
At 6:58 PM , Blogger Sling said...

mom- It's a genuine artificial bonanza sometimes!..
Now that I'm securely (I hope) back on line,the first thing I'm gonna do is get me one o' them authentic reproduction,goldtone diamonaire,limited to the first 300,000,000,000 callers,thingamabobs!..you know the ones.

 
At 7:17 PM , Blogger Auld Hat said...

Did I yell? Oh dear. It's the yelling that drives 'em all away. (weeps...queitly, mind you)

Anyhooooo, I wanted to say something decidedly awful about coming in back doors but will leave it up to the professionals.

 
At 7:26 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Butt!!...who nose?
(semi-pro here). :)

 
At 8:16 PM , Blogger Monica said...

almond is pronounced ammon?

 
At 8:22 PM , Blogger Auld Hat said...

ahhhhhmonnnnn. It's one of yer basic sacred nuts.

 
At 8:23 PM , Blogger Sling said...

monica- ...Apparently,the region surrounding O-Town is this country's largest producer of Ammons!..so I give 'em their props.

 
At 8:28 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Hat- Not ahhhh!...aaaah!...like in,..ummm...at.
I gotta live here!...dammit.

 
At 8:29 PM , Blogger yellowdog granny said...

cool..a new floor.wish i had hardwood instead of this shit brick gray no nap carpet..
I am still trying to figure out how to erase my hard drive so i can put in the xp that was giving to me..and hook up my new computer..with printer...hire the handicapped...we're fun to watch..

 
At 8:42 PM , Blogger Sling said...

yellowdog G.- Oh shit,oh dear!

1. Start up yer computer with the XP disk in the drive.(you may have to turn the power on..put the disk in the CD drive...and turn it off)..Starting up again.

2. You will see a message,"boot from disk?"..do nothing!..don't touch the keyboard!

3. In a few seconds(a minute?),a screen will appear asking if you want to do one of several things...Choose, "Install Windows XP".

4. You will see "Partitions" displayed.. choose to delete the main(the one with the most numbers) partition...

5. Select to "format" that partition.(this may take as long as 1 hour!!,as long as it is progressing,however slowly,don't mess with it).

6.XP installation should continue,with easily understandable instructions after that..

or your 'puter might explode...one or the other.. ;)

 
At 11:29 PM , Blogger Lorraine said...

I've been cogitating on this since you left the info on my blog...seeing it here put me in mind of it again and I've tried it out and I'm with Mon. Salmon and almond are not pronounced the same way. One of them is going to sound very stupid if you do and the one that will sound stupidest is the fish and they actually have some sort of brain function and consequently, all due respect to the fine almond growers of Northern California, no no and no.

I think you're new faux floor will be fine and fabulous. Almond wood?

 
At 7:33 AM , Anonymous tater said...

I, too, am very disturbed by this almond conundrum. I try and force my breath, lips, and tongue to form "Ammon" but they just won't go there. Sounds too much like an Egyptian Deity, and not enough like something to ingest, or roast in my oven. I think I could say "sawlman", cause it matchy matches one of my favorite authors that many Muslims would like to see roasted on a cedar plank over hot coals. I think I will just stick with what I know, however, and avoid those Almond growers, and their disturbing manipulations of pronunciation.

 
At 8:39 AM , Blogger Doralong said...

I shan't worry about the pronunciation issue, whenever I travel in Northern California, no one seems to understand me anyway..

 
At 9:29 AM , Blogger jp said...

Clearly you are not trying hard enough. I personally know of 48 ways to lay around on the couch in a vegetative state.

 
At 9:39 AM , Blogger Kimberly Ann said...

Whenever I pronounce it Amman, I feel like a snob, so I'd rather say Almond and chew on my Jeff Foxworthy brand of beef jerky.

 
At 10:08 AM , Blogger more cowbell said...

Procrastinators unite! Later! Can't you get your cat to install the genuine faux flooring? Sheesh.

 
At 4:26 PM , Blogger Sling said...

lorraine- I saw the lord high mucky-muck from the universal brotherhood of almond growers on the news,and he was quite adamant that the "al" in almond is pronounced the same way as in Salmon..
At first I thought,"Well,..that just sounds stupid!"
But then I thought,"He is a professional after all,so perhaps I should defer to him".
Then I thought,"Gee..I sure am glad they don't grow Walnuts.."

tater- I haven't thought of Mr.Rushdie in like,forever!
Apparently,the unusual pronunciation is limited to about 10 square miles of NorCal...Even people that grew up here are like,"What?"..

doralong- Oh,these almond growers won't have no truck with "outsiders"!..
But your charming accent is welcome here in O-Town anytime!

JP- Will any of those 5 extra ways make me look gay?..just wonderin'.

kimberly ann- It really does sound pretentious doesn't it...I mean,..we're just talkin' about nuts here,right?

Cowbelle- The mothly meeting of the procrastinators club has been postponed until further notice!
..and Gizzy refuses to do manual labor of any kind.

 
At 4:42 PM , Blogger Middle Child said...

I am sure being such a whizz you will have that flooring dwn by now and will be posting photos of it soon... good luck!

Its so hot here... ants and crawlies...things that creep anmd crawl are busy mutating out in the yard....... aalmond, salmon Ammun...too hard for me.

Now if you want to know how we pronounce it down under, depending where you live also... Its almond rhyming with Amun (form old Egypt) but then again you may pronounce that word differently... Salmon hyymes with Gammon, never with almond...and both tast pretty good...which I had eother, especially salmon, capers, cream cheese...Think I may have to do some grocery shopping soon... one can of dog food left so tomorrows the day...

rambling now!

 
At 4:43 PM , Blogger Middle Child said...

Spot the spelling and typos above.... : (

 
At 4:51 PM , Blogger Doralong said...

Well honey- my accent really isn't all that thick in the least.. but you sweet folks in N. Cali have always been awfully nice to me every time I have visited.

But that said- you boys out there are total suckers for southern girls.. Those guys in Sonoma just love me.

 
At 8:07 AM , Blogger the rube said...

wood floors, tres classy

it's a lucky man who has an angel to fix his computer then teach the finer points of katas to his dear old dad.

 
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