Wednesday, March 25, 2009

You can't buy this in stores..

This is,by far, the easiest post I've ever done,..because I didn't have to bother with all the muss and fuss of having to be creative.
All I had to do was visit everyone on my blogroll,..copy,..and paste.

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Allan: "I sifted the rat poison out of your oatmeal", chimed Fancy as she held up my flour sifter," it's safe now!"..

Citymouse: Life is to short to be bitter or to hold in you feeling or to be unhappy. Could you imagine living ever day saying should have would have could have? I can't.

Lorraine: The first leg of the flight was already a success upon boarding. I was assigned a middle seat and was worried because I was one of the last to board. It was with great relief that I discovered myself seated between 2 women who were both contained within the province of their own seats, if you know what I mean.

JP: But mostly I think I just want to play with all the cool kids, because I've come to realize that's really what it was all about anyway. And as far as what I want to be when I grow up, I've also come to realize that not everybody was meant to be something. Some people were just meant not to grow up at all.
That's where I fit in.

Random Thinker: Robins are a reliable sign that spring is here. When the leaves turn colors and the geese fly south you know that it's fall. I hate to be the one to break it to MSN Money but there will be no unmistakable harbinger of our rebound.

Yellowdog Granny: Oh...and one bit of funny news...guess who got a jury summons? Yup me. I think that's hysterical..You know they must be at the bottom of the pile if all they could come up with is me..I hope it's something good..

Rosemary: ...OK, so my sense of humor is a bit odd.

Middle Child: I wish I had known about this when mum was alive and suffering. She was a lovely and funny mum and had more compassion in her little finger than many have in their whole body.

Monica: One kid was like "You talked about blah blip and blap but you left out anything about goo gob and boo."
"Yes" She stared.
He continued "So... did you want to say anything about it?"
"No, that's why I left it out.

Citizen of the world: Nothing like sitting outside with ice cream to make you feel like you are on the way to summer.

More Cowbell: Are we the only country in the world that doesn't recognize it as just football? OK, never mind, that's another rant. I'll call it soccer so everyone will know what the hell I'm talking about, and so I won't look like a pissy, purse-lipped grammar-control-freak pain in the ass. Even though I pretty much am.

Parenthetically Speaking: REMEMBER -- SOME PEOPLE ARE ALIVE SIMPLY BECAUSE IT IS ILLEGAL TO SHOOT THEM.

Poodle and Dog Blog: Dog training, like human teaching, is an art. And like human teachers, dog trainers are different in their personalities and approaches. As long as there are good results, there are different ways to achieve them.

Booda Baby: And then the amazement happened. Friends - unreminded, uncoaxed,uninvited because it was, by design, just family - remembered me.

Pitted Windshields: HHM to CS:
Hi C how was your day?
Long pause....
CS: A kid threw up on me. Stomach flu going around dear.
End of conversation.

Tater: The theme for last month was definitely chocolate, and these campaigns were for two different companies. Style was not dictated by me, but rather by the art directors. Interesting to note the differences. The down shots are missing the copy in the left top third, which is why there is an apparent hole there. Twas intentional, so as not to interfere with their tag lines.

Doralong: Would that not tell you that you are beyond fucked up? But that’s just my opinion. Perhaps I’m being unduly harsh, I can be like that, I can be a judgmental bitch that way.

Mom: My daughter is out of town for a few days. I spent one night with her kids and helped with the carpooling for a day. These grandchildren of mine are wonderful, well behaved, delightful people. I cherish every minute with them. I am used to living with one quiet man. My daughter's household is full of people and wonderful chaos.

Speck: I had another very strange dream this morning that went on forever. Stay with me here. Get a cuppa Joe and get comfortable, this is gonna take a while.

Willym: Listening to her singing Vissi d'arte (I lived for art alone.) makes me think that if this was what a second string soprano sounded like then, how come we can't find a first string soprano that good today?

Sageweb: There must have been 60 secret service agents standing on the tarmac in their black suit waiting for Air Force One to land. It was in the 80’s yesterday so I am sure they were all sweaty and gross. If I were the president, I would have warm weather uniforms for the secret service. Tan pants and Hawaiian shirts, yes dorky but, comfy.

Billy Pilgrim: even with high expectations, i love you sons of bitches.

Lost in color: Life continues to be a challenge...

Danny: well, being mr. popular...like i am prone to be...yes, i know! i can hear your eyes rolling into the back of your heads...

Miss Healthypants: I HATE mashed potatoes. I can eat french fries and even baked potatoes (with the appropriate dousing of sour cream), but the mushy texture of mashed potatoes makes me want to vomit. And as a matter of fact, when I was very little and my Dad tried to make me eat mashed potatoes, that’s just what I did.

Evilganome: According to Bertha, aside from the Brown's there is also a branch of the family called Stewart. She of course claims these are the royal Stewart's. Other than the fact that Bonnie Prince Charlie was another hopeless and useless drunk, I have no reason to believe that this portion of the family was ever anything more than a group of drunken sheep thieves, who managed to get themselves deported to Canada by supporting Charles Stewart's claim, rather than actual descendants of the Stewart dynasty.

Mimi’s Pa: I have my own spin on a Larry King interview.
Larry King with Jesus as a guest.
"So Jesus. Welcome to the show".
"Thank you Larry. It's good to be here."
"So. I hear you used to be a carpenter. What was that like? Do you miss it?"..
****************************

The whole thing took all of 15 minutes,and I got treated to more humor,insight,and pathos than a body has a right to expect from a year's subscription to,..well,..some kind of world renowned literary thing that world renowned literary types might subscribe to.
(Did I just end a sentence with a preposition?..Screw 'em)..

It's Wednesday,..and life is happy as a pig in poo in Sling's Domain.

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23 Comments:

At 6:03 PM , Blogger citizen of the world said...

You know if you strung that together without the identifying names, you'd sound psychotic.

 
At 6:06 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Citizen- SEE!..That's exactly what I love about it! :)

 
At 6:13 PM , Blogger Mom said...

Ain't Blogland grand!

 
At 6:18 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Mom- Every day is an adventure in Bloggertown..

 
At 7:45 PM , Blogger sageweb said...

The little blog world seems so much more entertaining when you put us all in one room on top of each other.

 
At 7:51 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Sage Oh,..that comment is SO going in my next recap!..

 
At 8:12 PM , Blogger Random Thinker said...

Ain't the internet grand?

 
At 8:45 PM , Blogger jan said...

Do we all get royalties when the book is published?

 
At 8:52 PM , Blogger Sling said...

Random Thinker- ..It's like Heaven on a cloud.

Jan- If I call it an 'Anthology',can I avoid all those pesky copyright infringements?

 
At 12:16 AM , Blogger Middle Child said...

Ah Sling, I tried to explain to the most stupid of my four sisters who I love dearly why blogging is so important to me...they didn't get it..you get it big time as do most of we...
Its the input you get, the humour, the sarcasm. the wisdom, the compassion and kindness...its eeing the world through others eyes...Thank you so much for this...we may be a desparate lot of people but we are real. Real is becomming such a rare thing as we grow older...

You blokes say "as happy as a pig in poo " and we Aussies say "As happy as a pig in shit" close ..but we use the shit word often...like Ratshit (exhausted) etc...good post Sling

 
At 4:25 AM , Blogger austexgrl said...

What a wonderful way to start my morning! I do believe sarcasm is so-o-o under rated . Thanx Sling.

 
At 7:41 AM , Blogger yellowdog granny said...

well, i fecking loved that

 
At 9:00 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Middle Child- That's exactly what I wanted to say with this post!..
How easy it was to demonstrate by picking little gems from my treasure box of blogpals.
It's the reason you might find me standing in line at the grocery store,grinning from ear to ear for no apparent reason. :)

austexgrl- Starting my day with these kids is as necessary as my morning coffee..I'm all cranky if I miss out.

Yellerdawg- ..and I feckin' love you doll!

 
At 5:34 PM , Blogger booda baby said...

I gotta say, that was a whole lot easier than visiting everyone myself. Don't suppose there's a paying gig in there, somewhere?

 
At 8:16 AM , Blogger Doralong said...

You know, in a perverse sort of way it really does make sense as a narrative.

 
At 9:19 AM , Blogger Sling said...

Booda Babe- Oh,you still must visit them..Otherwise it would be like trying to eat only 1 fig newton out of a whole sleeve.
..You just can't do it. ;)

Doralong- Do you suppose there is some kind of collective consciousness that developes between bloggers?..Like a subliminal attempt to communicate with the hive?
That would be cool.
Scary,..but cool.

 
At 10:35 AM , Blogger jp said...

I didn't even know Monica was a blogging again... AND being freaking hilarious. I need to go there.

 
At 11:27 AM , Blogger LostInColor said...

That was great! always the creative dude that you are.

 
At 1:19 PM , Blogger billy pilgrim said...

this looks like it took a lot of work to me, you must love us sons of bitches.

 
At 1:23 PM , Blogger more cowbell said...

That was deliciously schizophrenic. Did I spell that right? Because you know what a crazyass grammarcontrolfreak pissy bitch I can be. Do I smell a regular feature here?

 
At 6:42 PM , Blogger Miss Healthypants said...

Well, that was fun! :)

And now I have even more blogs I have to read--thanks A LOT. *grin*

 
At 9:09 PM , Blogger yellowdog granny said...

maybe you should go to each of the blogs you read and just make a paragraph out of the first sentence of each of their posts..i bet that would rock..and i fecking love you too

 
At 10:29 AM , Blogger Monica said...

hahahahahaha sentences out of context are funny :)

 

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