Ask Sling..

Dear self,..

I think I'm having a depression.
I mean,..I watch all those 'Good morning O-Town',and 'Wake-up with talking heads' shows during my time off,and I'm pretty sure I have all the symptoms.

Trouble sleeping some nights,..or wanting to sleep all day..

Lack of motivation,..and an apathetic tendency to let my vintage collection of 'TV Guides' just gather dust in some obscure corner of the basement,without pouring over the entire decade of the 60's in my ever continuing quest to find a photo of Barbara Eden in her genie outfit where she shows her navel.
Oh yes,..even that has lost it's appeal.

Plus!..When I see all those commercials telling me that two out of three people being treated for depression,still suffer from symptoms of depression,I don't even have the energy to question the mathematical advantage of treatment,..I just get more depressed.

**Sigh**

..I guess I just need a little heartfelt sympathy.
You always seem to give such thoughtful and well considered advice,so I asked myself,..'What would Sling do?'..

Yours truly,
Alter Ego..


*********************


Dear whiny-ass-shut-the-fuck-up-and-grow-a-pair.. self,

Holy Flyin' Jesus Christ on a Popsicle Stick!!..
Don't I have have enough crap to deal with,without having to respond to your self-indulgent,pseudo-introspective,'poor little me',..nobody likes me,everybody hates me,why don't I eat some worms BULLSHIT??

What?..You don't think the whole world has a knot in their stomachs the size of Cleveland over the friggin' state of the things here in the very infancy of the twenty-first century??
I'm payin' five bucks for a goddamm pack of cigarettes fer chrissake!..and do you hear me bitching?..

Okay,..you do.

But still,my point is that I don't have the time or inclination to untwist your precious little tidy whiteys,..so nut up and deal with it!

Anygivemeafuckingbreak,..I'm here to help,..so here is my advice;

STOP TOUCHING YOURSELF!..It isn't helping your self-esteem any..

And here's a Friday Jukebox Video to help cheer you up.
..I can't freakin' believe I'm indulging you!



'I'm yours'