WOMEN...CAN'T LIVE WITH 'EM,..

..can't live without 'em.

I discarded organized religion a long time ago.Not because of a lack of faith,just a constant inability to reconcile doctrine and dogma with the things I knew to be true in my heart.Still,Sundays remain a day of reflection,and introspection.

Today my thoughts turned,not to those I've loved and lost,but to those I've loved and never won.

"Jesus Sling!"..."The grass is ALWAYS greener huh?"

Well,..Yeah...I guess it is.

I'm thinkin' that this may very well be a universal experience.

Emmylou Harris and The Chieftains' "Barbara Allan"

WHEN CARNIVORES ATTACK!!

Imagine,if you will,the wary and elusive Burgersaurus as he cautiously makes his way through the primordial haze of the twilight world of Sling's Domain.
The warm,seductive glow of the Bar-B-Que beckons,as he ventures out onto the open plain when suddenly,...
The whiff of charcoal!...The rustle of paper plates!!..It's over faster than you can say, "pass the potato salad"...It's a life or death struggle where only the strong survive.
God help me,..I love it so.

I DON'T LIKE CHANGE..

...I especially don't like it when I'm forced to do it because some nameless Fucktard decided he needed my stuff more than I did.

In real life,I could snatch him up by the hair and slap him so hard that his kids would be born dizzy.

I would hit him on top of the head so hard,it would break both his ankles.

I'd jerk a knot in his tailbone,and then knock him into the middle of next week!

(I'm almost done)

• I'd rip off his arm,and beat him over the head with it..Then,
• I'd tear off his head,and piss down his neck.
• I'd put a boot up his ass,..and
• I'd get his sister pregnant,...just to kill a rabbit!

I was walkin' down a street o' mud.
Walked into a place called "The Bucket O' Blood".
Sat at the table,ordered somethin' to eat.
Got a muddy glass of water,and a stale piece of meat.

So I jumped up on the table,and said with a shout!
"I'm the baddest Mother Fucker,without a doubt!"

"I swam the Mississippi,and I didn't get wet!"
"Jumped off the Empire State building,and I ain't dead yet...

..But this is cyberspace,and according to every 12-step program I've ever suffered through,I need to accept these things.Although,I feel a certain amount of "chest thumping" is in order.

I'm almost done putting my blog back together.It's more or less the same,only different.It's REALLY hard to read all those tiny words in my template,hence the need to vent,..just a little..

Now,if I could just run into this guy on the street... ;)

PORNO AND PIPE BOMBS!!

Yesterday,I was suddenly and rudely 86'd from my blog.

"Internet Explorer is unable to open http:/ yada,yada"
So I bit the bullet and deleted that addy,and created a new spot.
Now I don't know how, but some punk opened up a little porn spot where my blog used to be.

Oh well,I'll probably get over it.

***NOW FOR THE REAL NEWS!***

When I got home from work just a few minutes ago the O-Town constabulary had both ends of my street blocked off.They found an honest to God PIPE BOMB!

After a few minutes they had it squirreled away in their solid Titanium mobile bomb disposal and deluxe crock-pot thingy and...BOOOMM!!!....

It was TOTALLY RAD!!!...I mean,..except for the whole part where we all could have been blown to smithereens by some horribly demented,catastrophically cretinous,genetically malformed asshole..That kinda sucked.

Well thanx to blogger I gotta start over..

BASTARDS!!!!!