2008: The Year That Didn't Entirely Suck...

You know how you go all year long worrying from one day to the next over the inescapable truth that the economy is in an inexorable downward spiral and how this is gonna affect your job and then sure as shit you get laid off and on top of that the whole country has lost it's fuckin' mind and is seriously thinking about elevating Methuselah and his lovely assistant Caribou Barbie to the highest offices in the land and just because 'West Wing' suffered the eventual consequence of term limits doesn't mean they had to cancel 'Boston Legal' and I'll be a son-of-a-bitch if O.J. doesn't well and truly need an orange jumpsuit with his name embroidered on it and the highlight of your day is your regularly scheduled meeting of 'Sex without Partners',..but then you stop to consider that unlike a whole lotta folks you have a roof over your head and plenty of food,not to mention that you are way more healthy than your lifestyle should permit and not only do you have a worldwide cadre of Brilliant Blog Buddies but you actually got to meet some few of them in real life and in slightly less than three weeks BARACK OBAMA WILL BE PRESIDENT OF THESE UNITED STATES!??..

..It's like that.

****Happy New Year Kids!****

In the news..

Normally,I don't steal from my fellow bloglodites.
Okay,..I do it all the time,but still..

My point is,that Jan over at 'The Poodle and Dog Blog' posted a link to this cool website,and I decided it was way too much fun not to pass along!

..click to enlarge


G'head..Have a ball!
..you know you want to.

It's not too late to smother me with hugs and kisses!..

I trust everyone had a most delightful,and heartwarming Christmas day!

We celebrated quietly around the homestead,gathering about the tree to enjoy Little Newt's gleeful plunge into his well deserved bounty,and reveling in the triptophentastic excesses of the traditional holiday meal,lovingly prepared by Lizzard King,and Mom O' Same.

As an added bonus,..I turned 55 years old!
Successfully making the transition from middle-age into Senior Citizenship,thus becoming eligible for all the rights and privileges proscribed therein.

Including,..but not limited to;

• Wagging my finger at the neighborhood kids and exclaiming 'By-Cracky!' for no apparent reason.
• Wandering into the liquor store wearing my robe and pajamas for a six-pack of Schlitz and a pepperoni stick,..in the middle of the afternoon.
• **Shamelessly flirting with 20 year old waitresses,and having them refer to me as 'kindly',....and,
• Making pointless references to obscure historic events,as though everyone quite naturally understands what the hell it is I'm talkin' about..

Oh sure,..I've been doing these things for some few years,..but now it's sanctioned!

I want to give a shout out to all my blog buds that sent birthday e-mails,and e-cards,with a particular nod to Lorraine for her thoughtful phone call,and Yellowdog Granny for the surprise cornucopia of West,Texas goodies!

Have a great week kids!..

**(Offer not available in all establishments,..check your local listings)..

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!..

It's quiet,and warm,and I got a belly full o' turkey!

I hope this post finds you and yours in the best of health and spirits..As for me,
..it's Christmas Eve,and life is good in Sling's Domain!

****MERRY CHRISTMAS..HAPPY NEW YEAR!****



'Do You Hear What I Hear?'

Slinglets..

Darling Daughter sent me these most recent pix of herself,and the little ones.
Look how beautiful they are!
I don't get to be with 'em for the holidays,so this is the next best thing.

Tyler Anne..


Erin..

Jackson..


I really hope that's birthday cake on Jack's face..


Tyler must have taken this pic of her mom,and little brother and sister....

Nothin' unusual here..

Peace out!..

Bubble Lights...

When I was just a toddlin' lad,and beginning to recognize that there were some things that occurred in cycles,(yes,..I was precocious like that),I came to know that Santa Claus would be visiting us soon,because there were bubble lights on the tree.

No,..oddly enough,it wasn't the arrival of the tree itself,or standing aside dutifully while Pops wrestled it into perpendicular perfection.
It wasn't watching my mom and big sister carefully installing ornaments,and tinsel,and strings of popcorn.
..These things transpired in the light of day,you see.

In my developing sense of cause and effect,Santa wasn't officially coming until darkness fell,and the revealing glare of the table lamps in the living room were replaced with the soft,warm glow of those gently rising bubbles.
There was color,and motion,and a most satisfying quiet in my head.
..A trinity of talismans necessary to tempt Santa into overlooking the short list of misdeeds a young scalawag might accumulate during the course of a year.
The proof made manifest on Christmas morn,..the logic,inescapable..

You can still get bubble lights,although these days they are made of plastic,and not glass...at least the ones I've seen while out and about.
I prefer my memories..



'Valley Winter Song'

Between Iraq And A Hard Place...

It appears as though President Bush has at last uncovered weapons of mass destruction in Iraq,..cleverly disguised as a pair of size 9 1/2 Wing Tips!



Narrowly escaping not one,but two direct hits,Georgie attributed his finely tuned reflexes to,.. 'Havin' to dodge my mama's smacks upside the head as a boy'..

Friday Jukebox Dance Party Bingo!..

All the really cool kids are doin' the 'Bossa Nova'!

If you don't know how,..you may do the 'Twist',the 'Monkey',or the 'Mashed-Potato'.
..But not the 'Freddie'!!..trust me,you'll never live it down.

**Presented in Groovy Vision for your psychedelic convenience**





'Blame it on the Bossa Nova'

This was my plan..

I figured if I focused my telescope on the Moon,and then stuck my camera lens up to the telescope's lens,I just might be able to get a decent close-up of our faithful sattelite!
Well,..it ain't as easy as it sounds.

At high magnification,the Moon travels across the field faster than it appears to the naked eye,and you have to keep adjusting the tracking to keep up with it.
Plus!..You can't just put the camera lens directly in contact with the telescopic lens,..oh no..You have to keep it about 1/4 inch away,or the whole thing blacks out.
..and then find the image,follow it,wait for the camera to auto-focus,and then snap the shutter at just the right moment without shaking the camera,or bumping the telescope!..

Anyjiggle,..that's the name of that tune.

If,after about 37 tries,you take your best effort into Photoshop,and tweak it just a little...

Oh sure,..they do make cameras that will attach to the scope,and eliminate all that song and dance,..but what fun is that?

EDIT: For the astronomical purists among you that have noticed that the Moon is upside down,and want a scientific explanation for this phenomenon,the image is reversed because of,..stuff.

Weekend Update..

I dreamed last night that I was tending bar,and Rush Limbaugh came storming in,yelling at the top of his lungs, 'Clean this place up!!'..

So I told him,..'I'm not your goddamm mother!..YOU clean it up!!'

..This made perfect sense at the time.

****In other Milestone Moments****

Young Master Jackson celebrated his first complete trip around the Sun this very Saturday!

Along with close friends and family,a 'Petting Zoo' consisting of a fine assortment of barnyard animals were assembled in Darling Daughter's backyard to mark the event.

YEP!..Ponies were involved!

It's Monday,..and life is good in Little Jackson's Domain!

I may not know the law..

..but I know what I like.
I like Judges...

O.J. Simpson was sentenced to a minimum of 9 years in prison today,for his role in the kidnap,and armed robbery of a sports memorabilia dealer in Las Vegas.

I frequently find myself in the minority of those that say O.J. was 'not guilty' of the murder of Nichole Brown,and Ron Goldman,by virtue of the fact that he was found to be so by a jury of his peers.

That case,has no business being considered in the adjudication of his guilty verdict in this most recent complaint,and I applaud the Judge's skillfully crafted decision.

Perhaps you may disagree.
I really do understand your frustration.

'He got away with murder!'..

..and that may very well be...To this day,I'm undecided.
I am convinced that the State failed to make it's case beyond a reasonable doubt,and the jury in his murder trial made the correct decision under the law.
While the possibilty of a life sentence loomed on the horizon for O.J this very day,I think the judge made the proper call in her next-to-minimum sentence on the grounds that he has never been convicted of a previous felony act.

Feel free to vent your own dissenting opinion in 'comments' if you like.

As for me,..I've learned my lessons the hard way,just like my dad predicted I would eventually do,and have decided upon this firm commitment;..

I ain't misbehavin'..

Fun with poverty..

Like most bloggers,I've had to make a few adjustments of late to keep my standard of vices apace with my dwindling resources.
Sometimes,you just have to sacrifice certain luxuries,and focus primarily on those expenditures that are required of necessity.

One such luxury I've opted to forego,is the prohibitive expense of 'Tailor Made' cigarettes.

No Billy Pilgrim,..these aren't joints..


While a pack of generic smokes comes in at around $3.00,and lasts little more than a day,..one pouch of loose tobacco retails for about $2.25,and provides pure smoking pleasure for four full days!

Plus!..All the pomp and circumstance involved with the ritualistic preparation,and rolling of these little gems,invokes fond memories of my days as a long-haired-hippie-freak,..and offers up the satisfying opportunity to pretend that I am,in fact,a real cowboy...

Will work for money..

Is the economy really,truly,and fundamentally depressed?,..or does the current state of affairs ultimately boil down to perception?
I mean,..seriously.

How many generations of humanity passed,convinced that if you sailed far enough,you'd fall ass-over-teakettle off the edge of the Earth,before someone decided to test that theory,and venture beyond the horizon?

I only ask because it occurs to me that there is money floating about,eagerly awaiting opportunities to be spent,and a fairly stable population of humanoids perfectly willing to put their nose to the wheel,and grind out their daily bread.

The one major obstacle appears to be the universal consensus that,'Times are hard!'..
They must be!
After all,..everybody says so..

When I think about it,..really think about it in my most sober moments of clarity divined from nearly 55 years of going up and down upon the Earth,and walking to-and-fro' in it,I sincerely believe that there is much to be accomplished if I put my doubts aside,and followed the sage advice of persons more learned than myself.

..'Cast your bread upon the waters,and it will be returned to you ten-fold'..

Today,..I'm going to spend a buck or two.

**Bonus 'First of December' Music Video**



'Sweet Baby James'